The Perils Of Paying For Your Child’s Education
There are obvious benefits to sending your children off to college, and not only for your kids. Aside from the extra million or so your children are more likely to make during their lifetimes, it lessens the chances that you’ll have to raise and house them into their thirties and beyond for financial reasons. It improves the possibility that they might have money to help you through your retirement. It’s a fabulous investment in everybody’s future.
A child is, however, an investment with a mind of its own. Ask yourself, “Does my son/daughter want to go to college?” If he/she has low motivation, be very, very afraid for your investment.
Fortunately, there are some steps that every cunning parent can take to maximize the possibilities that your young ones will do you proud in the future.
*Invest the idea into their brains from a very young age.
Children are suggestible when they are young. Make sure you play up the benefits of college. Emphasize the growing need for continuing education throughout life. If your child is interested in studying topics that don’t bring in a good living, they will need more education than those who do not. Prepare their minds to accept and be ready for school, and for school to take much of their lives. If she accepts this idea, then school will simply be an incorporated part of her life, and it will be more likely to be an acceptable idea.
More drastic steps are called for if your children are already teenagers and resistant to the idea of further education. You will have to invest in classes yourself, and show your children by your actions the necessity of continuing education. Don’t think you can? How will your children accept college if you don’t? Children who have one or more parents with a degree themselves are statistically more likely to enter and finish college than those who haven’t. Period. The end. Make time for it, for everybody’s sake.
*Planning is just as important as saving (maybe more so).
If money is an issue for you, it doesn’t close the door on college. It means you’ll have to think smarter. More than one child means you’ll have to be even smarter than that.
Be realistic. Establish between the two of you (your child and yourself) whether or not you’re even aiming for college (I highly recommend aiming, no matter what the child’s interests). Everything else flows from that first decision, and the parents’ side of that commitment is more important than the child’s.
If your child tries to change his mind mid-stream, don’t get angry. Accept it. Not everybody in the world will go to college. Don’t let said child touch that money, however. Keep saving according to your plans. This money is your investment money in your child, not a trust fund they can do whatever they want with. If you don’t argue the point, he is much more likely to change his mind and agree to school at a later date.
*The money will follow the commitment.
Never lose sleep over where the money will come from. The money will come. If governmental financial aid isn’t available, loans are, although loans should be used in moderation and only as a last resort. Scholarships and grants are often available from many different sources.
Start saving money as soon as you decide that your baby’s going Ivy League. It doesn’t matter how much – nickels and dimes are a good start if that’s all you have. Set an amount or percentage and stick with it. Money invested and not touched for many years can’t help but build up over time. You may not be able to save up for the entire amount, but anything you CAN save will be money you won’t have to borrow.
*Help your baby get a job as soon as she’s legally old enough.
Lots of folks feel that children should be free to focus on college and nothing else other than “finding themselves”. I am not one of them.
Do grownups get to focus on one thing at a time? No way. Multitasking is the order of the day, and I guarantee it won’t hurt your teenagers either. It will better prepare them for the world of adulthood than school or after-school activities.
It’s actually kind of fun to watch kids set loose on a grunt job like construction or restaurant work, and watch them come home sore and ready to tackle their studies like there’s no tomorrow. When I started back to college myself after a long absence myself, I attended a student orientation where the president of the college stood and spoke of his first job that his father had gotten him, working the jackhammer on a road crew. He came home shaken to pieces and swore that he would get his degree, no matter what the cost. He did…right through to his Ph.D.
It’s my opinion that wealthy children may be at some disadvantage in this, unless their parents are wise enough to make them find work. Working provides a real-world laboratory that no school could ever hope to create artificially. Plus payment. It goes without saying that at least some of that child’s money can be put toward…you guessed it. A college education. Now you don’t have to shoulder the whole burden yourself. Breathing easier yet?
You really don’t want to pay for it all yourself. If the child doesn’t earn it (even a little bit), it’s not wholly hers and she’s much less likely to take her studies seriously.
I don’t want anyone to walk away from reading this and think that parents should not be involved in getting their children through college. You should help them every step of the way. Provide support, encouragement, and be their cheerleading section, but don’t step up and be their money tree, even if you can afford it.
Children can cry and scream and hold their breath and threaten to move out and get a job. Let them. The reality of working as even a low-level white collar worker and paying their own bills will bring them to their knees soon enough…and back to class.